First thought: Definitely agree with this, now for someone to implement it.
Second thought: OH HEY FIRST COMMENT!
Third thought: No wait that’s the second comment.
I agree with Church. It’s very hard to find a decent onion ring. It’s how I judge any new (non-ethnic) restaurant I visit. If the rings are bad I won’t be coming back.
Oh, I’ll have to check that.
Whenever I drop some peanuts or pizza or whatever I always wondered where it went after a few days.
Perhaps that’s why. I guess even Jesus eats every once in a while?
He doesn’t need to go out to eat what with the creation of fish, wine and loaves of bread but then again who would pass up the chance at some PIZZA? Okay Dr Claw for sure but then again he is evil.
It is really the “Take your car to a mechanic who won’t even look under the hood, but will just plug in a dinky gizmo, then tell you that some insignificant, but expensive part needs to be replaced. I mean, c’mon, if the part was really important, would you need a stupid light to tell you it was broken? You get along just fine without a ‘Check for missing steering wheel’ light, don’t you?” light, but they had to print that in a negative 10 point font in order to get it to fit, so they realized they had to shorten it.
The technical term is MIL, which stands for Malfunction Indicator Light (also Mother In Law, but that’s not important right now).
It used to be; if someone broke down alongside the road we could run out there with a screwdriver and a pair of pliers to figure it out. Now; we have them call a wrecker to drag it in – just because the flux capacitor sensor is dirty.
Yea I just wish they’d toss in Auto repair to the Public school system, I think kids would be better off learning how to fix their cars then how to be ubber liberal 😛
you know those stickers that say “no user-serviceable parts inside” ? They should have those on the engine bay of every modern car. The mechanic plugs in his little doohickey to tell him what’s wrong because even he doesn’t know just by looking at it (usually – I mean, if the engine is missing, or there’s a piston sticking out of the side of the engine block or something he’d probably have a clue …)
I remember when I started learning to drive (about 40-odd years ago) and anything that went wrong with my car back then I could usually fix – replace the brake pads? no worries. Air filter? oil filter? yep. Fix the accelerator link when it either stuck or became uncoupled? no problemo. Now I open the bonnet (hood) of my car and go …. “I guess the water goes in here …” and that’s only to refill the windscreen washers.
‘Every time you try and operate these weird black controls that are labeled in black on a black background, a little black light lights up in black to let you know you’ve done it.’
Every time you turn your key to “On”, just before you crank the engine, and for the short time after the engine starts – when the lights are on for a short time – that’s what’s going on. It’s testing the lights.
The thing about the “Check Engine” light is that it LITERALLY could mean anything from, “Hey, you didn’t tighten your gas cap all the way down last time you filled up the car” to “OMG SOMETHING JUST BROKE AND THE CAR IS FILLING WITH DEADLY CARBON MONOXIDE GAS YOU WILL DIE IN ABOUT THREE MINUTES.”
That’s not an exaggeration. Those are two things that both will make the “Check Engine” light go on.
So, basically, I guess the lesson is, “If the Check Engine light goes on, first, pull over and open all the windows to make sure you don’t die of carbon monoxide poisoning. Then, go over to your gas tank, and make sure that the gas cap is on tightly. If it is, then you’re PROBABLY not going to die of carbon monoxide poisoning. But keep the windows open until you see if the Check Engine light goes out.”
If it’s not the gas cap, then, yeah, it’s expensive. But check the gas cap first.
This is actual, serious, advice. Something you can use.
Yep — because, with some of the things that the “Check Engine” light can mean, “towing in instead of driving in” actually IS the right call. It’s the least-helpful method of informing someone that something has gone wrong since the pain response.
You’d think they could squeeze in a “check gas cap” light somewhere on the dashboard instead of the check engine light for everything from low tire pressure to poisonous gas. Sheesh!
I bet the Japanese are working on it right now!
“Check engine” doesn’t actually pick up tire pressure. It means “anything that could affect emissions.” Like, y’know, a loose gas cap letting gas vapor escape. Or poisonous gasses spewing out into the cabin.
But it won’t pick up, say, low tire pressure or that your brakes have failed. Because those will just kill you, but not affect your engine emissions.
First thought: Definitely agree with this, now for someone to implement it.
Second thought: OH HEY FIRST COMMENT!
Third thought: No wait that’s the second comment.
*Holds up a blue shell*
All those who oppose the shell must yield;
When Captain Mahnarch throws his mighty shell!
Does the ‘check engine’ light even mean anything? The engine is still there, and the light always turns on eventually even if everything works fine.
“The light is fine, still blinking away. It’s the stupid engine that’s broken.”
I know I wouldn’t mind if checking the engine meant getting some decent onion rings for once.
I agree with Church. It’s very hard to find a decent onion ring. It’s how I judge any new (non-ethnic) restaurant I visit. If the rings are bad I won’t be coming back.
If it helps, I saw a bumper sticker once that said, “I found Jesus – he was behind the couch the whole time.”
Oh, I’ll have to check that.
Whenever I drop some peanuts or pizza or whatever I always wondered where it went after a few days.
Perhaps that’s why. I guess even Jesus eats every once in a while?
He doesn’t need to go out to eat what with the creation of fish, wine and loaves of bread but then again who would pass up the chance at some PIZZA? Okay Dr Claw for sure but then again he is evil.
When the light came on, I checked. But the engine was still there, so no problem.
It is really the “Take your car to a mechanic who won’t even look under the hood, but will just plug in a dinky gizmo, then tell you that some insignificant, but expensive part needs to be replaced. I mean, c’mon, if the part was really important, would you need a stupid light to tell you it was broken? You get along just fine without a ‘Check for missing steering wheel’ light, don’t you?” light, but they had to print that in a negative 10 point font in order to get it to fit, so they realized they had to shorten it.
The technical term is MIL, which stands for Malfunction Indicator Light (also Mother In Law, but that’s not important right now).
It used to be; if someone broke down alongside the road we could run out there with a screwdriver and a pair of pliers to figure it out. Now; we have them call a wrecker to drag it in – just because the flux capacitor sensor is dirty.
Yea I just wish they’d toss in Auto repair to the Public school system, I think kids would be better off learning how to fix their cars then how to be ubber liberal 😛
I know I woulda.
you know those stickers that say “no user-serviceable parts inside” ? They should have those on the engine bay of every modern car. The mechanic plugs in his little doohickey to tell him what’s wrong because even he doesn’t know just by looking at it (usually – I mean, if the engine is missing, or there’s a piston sticking out of the side of the engine block or something he’d probably have a clue …)
I remember when I started learning to drive (about 40-odd years ago) and anything that went wrong with my car back then I could usually fix – replace the brake pads? no worries. Air filter? oil filter? yep. Fix the accelerator link when it either stuck or became uncoupled? no problemo. Now I open the bonnet (hood) of my car and go …. “I guess the water goes in here …” and that’s only to refill the windscreen washers.
They are trying (the manufacturers) to get to a point where you won’t even be able to open the hood. Or, even have a hood.
You might get a little pop-up lid that hides the window washer filler and a gas flap.
Well clearly you didn’t learn anything about being a liberal, otherwise you wouldn’t even own a car 😉
I’ve always wanted a “Check ‘Check Engine’ light” light, to let me know whether my “Check Engine” light was functioning properly.
‘Every time you try and operate these weird black controls that are labeled in black on a black background, a little black light lights up in black to let you know you’ve done it.’
H2G2 is the best.
But really, though, that light means nothing.
Every time you turn your key to “On”, just before you crank the engine, and for the short time after the engine starts – when the lights are on for a short time – that’s what’s going on. It’s testing the lights.
I’m not sure my 20- and 30-year-old vehicles come with that feature. But they do come with the feature of being for the most part readily repairable.
The thing about the “Check Engine” light is that it LITERALLY could mean anything from, “Hey, you didn’t tighten your gas cap all the way down last time you filled up the car” to “OMG SOMETHING JUST BROKE AND THE CAR IS FILLING WITH DEADLY CARBON MONOXIDE GAS YOU WILL DIE IN ABOUT THREE MINUTES.”
That’s not an exaggeration. Those are two things that both will make the “Check Engine” light go on.
So, basically, I guess the lesson is, “If the Check Engine light goes on, first, pull over and open all the windows to make sure you don’t die of carbon monoxide poisoning. Then, go over to your gas tank, and make sure that the gas cap is on tightly. If it is, then you’re PROBABLY not going to die of carbon monoxide poisoning. But keep the windows open until you see if the Check Engine light goes out.”
If it’s not the gas cap, then, yeah, it’s expensive. But check the gas cap first.
This is actual, serious, advice. Something you can use.
Oh please let it be the first one.
Can confirm.
I don’t know how many times people have actually had their cars towed into our shop because of a gas cap.
Not that they broke down, but they freak out and don’t want to damage anything.
Yep — because, with some of the things that the “Check Engine” light can mean, “towing in instead of driving in” actually IS the right call. It’s the least-helpful method of informing someone that something has gone wrong since the pain response.
You’d think they could squeeze in a “check gas cap” light somewhere on the dashboard instead of the check engine light for everything from low tire pressure to poisonous gas. Sheesh!
I bet the Japanese are working on it right now!
If at all, the Japanese are working on a remote control for the Check Engine light, so you can turn it off even from the back seats.
“Check engine” doesn’t actually pick up tire pressure. It means “anything that could affect emissions.” Like, y’know, a loose gas cap letting gas vapor escape. Or poisonous gasses spewing out into the cabin.
But it won’t pick up, say, low tire pressure or that your brakes have failed. Because those will just kill you, but not affect your engine emissions.
I had the check engine light come on in my jeep, but I also had a “gas cap” light come on as well,
changed the gas cap and the light went off….