Y’know all through my school career I had a similar nightmare. French is a compulsory subject here (2hrs/week all through secondary school) and I couldn’t help feeling they must be having us on and that later I’d discover that really the French spoke an entirely different language altogether which I’d then have to learn too.
My first visit to France was to Paris, which did nothing to alleviate that fear.
I can’t confirm your last panel but it does turn out that most French have passable English only to refuse speaking it if you’re actually English or American, just to make a point. A friend of mine taught me the trick of speaking in a heavy Scandinavian accent which immediately removes all barriers.
Another amazingly successful method is starting off with a polite “Bonjour!” instead of the typical ugly tourist “Hello!” or “Excuse me, please…” There are plenty of French people who are more than willing to help as much as they can, if the tourist (even an American with zero knowledge of French) simply demonstrates a little integration effort. I’ve tested this, and it works extremely well.
I’m convinced this works partially because of how terrible others sound speaking French – that they can’t bear to hear their language hacked up by others and will resort to speaking English to alleviate the pain.
Mark Twain said he never could get the French to understand their own language. Bill Bryson said that you politely ask in a bakery for a loaf of bread, and the woman behind the counter gives you a look of contempt and puts a dead beaver on the counter. When you say no, you don’t want a dead beaver, you want a loaf of bread, she turns to everyone else in the shop and says that this stupid American asked for a dead beaver and now he says he doesn’t want it. This goes on until you give up and slink out the door.
Iceland. It’s where it’s at. Good food, good people, everyone speaks English and are tolerant if you don’t speak Icelandic very well (or at all) and you’re in the country that created Lazy Town. 🙂
Best of all the country isn’t prone to going to Hell, other than the odd volcano or quake. Sure, Bjork is from there but it’s not like the country can be perfect, right? Besides, saying the name of the capital is fun. Reykjavík. Try it! ^_^
My neighbor here in Berlin is a German who spent time working in London. She speaks fluent English with an accent that makes her sound like British royalty. I’ve been amusing myself by trying to teach her to say dumb American phrases with a Texas drawl.
Texas and not Bronx or Boston? ….
Okay, Maybe not.
A Boston accent is to American English as Bavarian is to German or a Newfoundland accent is to Canadian English [note:everyone but the Quebecois love our Newfies]
Finland, Finland, Finland,The country where I want to be,
Pony trekking or camping,Or just watching TV,
Finland, Finland, Finland,It’s the country for me.
You’re so near to Russia, So far from Japan,
Quite a long way from Cairo, Lots of miles from Vietnam.
Finland, Finland, Finland, The country where I want to be,
Eating breakfast or dinner, Or snack lunch in the hall,
Finland, Finland, Finland, Finland has it all.
You’re so sadly neglected, And often ignored,
A poor second to Belgium, When going abroad.
Finland, Finland, Finland, The country where I quite want to be,
Your mountains so lofty, Your treetops so tall,
Finland, Finland, Finland, Finland has it all.
Can’t find it, but I liked the long-ago cartoon in which you imagined working in France, where you could call in sick with existential ennui and there was red wine in the water fountains, or something like that.
Of course France is better than America. And not because France is necessarily all that great, one of the only countries with an equally inflated opinion of itself.
Oh, Adam; come now. The French language is so easy a child can speak it! At least, that’s what I keep telling myself between Duolingo lessons. Of course, I have not yet determined whether that knowledge is encouraging or intimidating… But still.
La France n’est pas forcément mieux qu’un autre pays, la langue est certes un peu compliquée à apprendre, même certains Français ne la maitrisent toujours pas correctement.
Et je vous rassure, les Français trouvent l’Anglais très compliqué aussi …
Comme l’a dit Thierry un peu plus haut, Paris n’est pas la ville où les gens sont le plus accueillants et sympathiques, mais c’est joli à visiter.
Si les gens ne répondent pas quand on leur parle en Anglais, c’est tout simplement parce qu’il ne le comprennent pas. Les Français ne sont pas du tout doués lorsqu’il s’agit des langues étrangères.
Et j’adore les étrangers qui essaient de parler Français ! mon accent en Anglais est horrible aussi cela dit en passant.
Bref, continuez de venir, certains vous recevrons avec grand plaisir 🙂
Adam, super boulot, j’adore te lire.
For educational purpose, I didn’t translate so you can work your french lessons.
Greetings from a French fan
Aww, no rendition of Return of the Jedi 🙁
Reminds me of panel #4 of one of my all-time favorite Bug comics: https://www.bugmartini.com/comic/bucket-list/
Y’know all through my school career I had a similar nightmare. French is a compulsory subject here (2hrs/week all through secondary school) and I couldn’t help feeling they must be having us on and that later I’d discover that really the French spoke an entirely different language altogether which I’d then have to learn too.
My first visit to France was to Paris, which did nothing to alleviate that fear.
I can’t confirm your last panel but it does turn out that most French have passable English only to refuse speaking it if you’re actually English or American, just to make a point. A friend of mine taught me the trick of speaking in a heavy Scandinavian accent which immediately removes all barriers.
Another amazingly successful method is starting off with a polite “Bonjour!” instead of the typical ugly tourist “Hello!” or “Excuse me, please…” There are plenty of French people who are more than willing to help as much as they can, if the tourist (even an American with zero knowledge of French) simply demonstrates a little integration effort. I’ve tested this, and it works extremely well.
I’m convinced this works partially because of how terrible others sound speaking French – that they can’t bear to hear their language hacked up by others and will resort to speaking English to alleviate the pain.
I had the opposite results, when I tried speaking any French at all, the most common response was that they flatly ignored me.
Mark Twain said he never could get the French to understand their own language. Bill Bryson said that you politely ask in a bakery for a loaf of bread, and the woman behind the counter gives you a look of contempt and puts a dead beaver on the counter. When you say no, you don’t want a dead beaver, you want a loaf of bread, she turns to everyone else in the shop and says that this stupid American asked for a dead beaver and now he says he doesn’t want it. This goes on until you give up and slink out the door.
Remember the Nine Commandments: (http://marriedwithchildren.wikia.com/wiki/Nine_Commandments)
Rule Two: It is wrong to be French.
Iceland. It’s where it’s at. Good food, good people, everyone speaks English and are tolerant if you don’t speak Icelandic very well (or at all) and you’re in the country that created Lazy Town. 🙂
Best of all the country isn’t prone to going to Hell, other than the odd volcano or quake. Sure, Bjork is from there but it’s not like the country can be perfect, right? Besides, saying the name of the capital is fun. Reykjavík. Try it! ^_^
My neighbor here in Berlin is a German who spent time working in London. She speaks fluent English with an accent that makes her sound like British royalty. I’ve been amusing myself by trying to teach her to say dumb American phrases with a Texas drawl.
Texas and not Bronx or Boston? ….
Okay, Maybe not.
A Boston accent is to American English as Bavarian is to German or a Newfoundland accent is to Canadian English [note:everyone but the Quebecois love our Newfies]
Well, honestly, Paris have a reputation of being snobs even in France (or so I understood).
Go anywhere but Paris, and it should be better.
Forget Norway!
Finland, Finland, Finland,The country where I want to be,
Pony trekking or camping,Or just watching TV,
Finland, Finland, Finland,It’s the country for me.
You’re so near to Russia, So far from Japan,
Quite a long way from Cairo, Lots of miles from Vietnam.
Finland, Finland, Finland, The country where I want to be,
Eating breakfast or dinner, Or snack lunch in the hall,
Finland, Finland, Finland, Finland has it all.
You’re so sadly neglected, And often ignored,
A poor second to Belgium, When going abroad.
Finland, Finland, Finland, The country where I quite want to be,
Your mountains so lofty, Your treetops so tall,
Finland, Finland, Finland, Finland has it all.
Can’t find it, but I liked the long-ago cartoon in which you imagined working in France, where you could call in sick with existential ennui and there was red wine in the water fountains, or something like that.
Here it is: https://www.bugmartini.com/comic/office-francais/
Of course France is better than America. And not because France is necessarily all that great, one of the only countries with an equally inflated opinion of itself.
Oh, Adam; come now. The French language is so easy a child can speak it! At least, that’s what I keep telling myself between Duolingo lessons. Of course, I have not yet determined whether that knowledge is encouraging or intimidating… But still.
La France n’est pas forcément mieux qu’un autre pays, la langue est certes un peu compliquée à apprendre, même certains Français ne la maitrisent toujours pas correctement.
Et je vous rassure, les Français trouvent l’Anglais très compliqué aussi …
Comme l’a dit Thierry un peu plus haut, Paris n’est pas la ville où les gens sont le plus accueillants et sympathiques, mais c’est joli à visiter.
Si les gens ne répondent pas quand on leur parle en Anglais, c’est tout simplement parce qu’il ne le comprennent pas. Les Français ne sont pas du tout doués lorsqu’il s’agit des langues étrangères.
Et j’adore les étrangers qui essaient de parler Français ! mon accent en Anglais est horrible aussi cela dit en passant.
Bref, continuez de venir, certains vous recevrons avec grand plaisir 🙂
Adam, super boulot, j’adore te lire.
For educational purpose, I didn’t translate so you can work your french lessons.
Greetings from a French fan
even ME, the French guy, can’t even get along to learn French perfectly. lol